May 12, 2022

Do we care for others because we love them OR do we love others because we care for them?  I came across this question several months ago and I find myself thinking about it more and more.  Why do we love others?

I recently became a grandmother – a “Lolly” to be exact!  And yes, I have volumes of sweet photos to prove it.  Before I gained entry into this amazing club, I always had the appropriately kind words when anyone would share about their grands.  But honestly, I didn’t “know.”  And how could I?  I had never experienced such a profound love.  I distinctly remember driving to the hospital when we received the news that Cosmo had made it safe and sound to join us on our earthly walk.

As I drove, I had a surge of energy which I can only attribute to God.  I was so overcome with love for this tiny life that tears began to well up. Instead of wiping them away, I let them trickle down my face.  When I finally parked, I sat in sacred stillness for a few moments – praying and listening. I had an undeniable knowing that I already loved little Cosmo, even though I had never cared for him.

When I was in 8th grade, my Grandma Alene moved to a nursing home.  I loved to play bingo with her whenever I could.  Grandma Alene was awesome.  She was always happy and had the best hugs. Naturally, everyone wanted to play at her table.

Hazel could never keep up, no matter how slowly they said the numbers.  She was constantly flustered and even mad.  I began to care for her during those bingo games.  Honestly, it didn’t take a lot. I simply helped place the markers when her numbers were called. One day I showed up ready to play and Hazel’s seat was empty.  I was floored. We were just getting in our rhythm!  Grandma Alene comforted me, but Hazel’s death was unexpectedly hard.  I had come to love her because I had the chance to care for her.

After wrestling with the idea of why we love, I believe the question is not actually a question.  We care for others because we love them AND we love others because we care for them.

What the world needs now is indeed love, no matter how you find your way to it.

– Tisha Tate Garcia, Hospitality Team