Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. – Ephesians 4:31-32
I used to spend way too much time in my life angry about one thing or another. After being frustrated with managing people, I decided there had to be a better way. I came to realize that people want to be spoken to in a way that makes them feel like they matter. They want to be heard in a way that makes them feel someone is listening. I genuinely care about people but used to wonder why they thought I didn’t have time for them.
People became disheartened and angry with me. When I started to ask why, the answer was typically, “you don’t have time to talk to me,” or “you are not listening when I speak.” My eyes were opened with each of these statements. I needed to be able to communicate effectively with my staff, so they were not angry or frustrated with me. There is a lot of value and wisdom in what I received from their feedback. I knew enough to realize that if something is not working, you must change the way you are doing it.
Let our eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you. – Proverbs 4:25
These words resonate with me, so I must look at who is in front of me and not be busy with everything around me. Focus on the people who are important in my personal and work life, to make sure that they are heard, helping to alleviate the anger and frustration. I am able to look back and see how this hindered me in my life and ask for forgiveness. I am grateful for their forgiveness and ability to make me see how important each and every one of them are to me.
When you are angry with someone, or someone is angry with you, find a way to look deeper into the reason for this feeling. Sometimes you are the one who needs to change and forgive in order for the situation to improve. Sometimes you have to apologize and be forgiven. Is there someone you have a misunderstanding with today? Look deeper and forgive. It will be a great weight lifted from your mind.
Gabrielle Moon, Exec. Director, St. Luke’s Children’s Centers
